We all dream to get rid of bad habits, tell them how to do it.
Psychologists claim that one of the main causes of addictions are psychological problems. Which, in turn, caused by stress. To find out what it is let’s look at some of them.
Stress and excess weight as the reaction to it
Everyone reacts to stress differently – someone suddenly loses appetite, and someone, on the contrary, can not restrain their hunger. The constant desire to eat, when actually you are not hungry, and desire so strong that you cannot resist him, indicates that you “seize” their alarm. For example, sometimes the “biting” attack people only at home and he eats for the night. Psychologists say: this indicates that this alarm is likely not related to professional activity, as during the working day this problem a person does not arise. If it makes itself felt only in the home environment, this is the real reason to analyze the situation in the family. Often, a person rushes to the fridge, not to quarrel with the husband or wife. Or sticking already a conflict.
It happens that a person asks you not to turn off the lights at night, or perhaps can’t stand the silence, so he needs constant background in the form included on the TV or radio. And sometimes both at the same time. This indicates that his life is of great importance fear. Such habits are fixed, usually in childhood, when the child begs to stay with him until he falls asleep, leave the lights and/or open the door to the nursery, etc. Growing up, these people often acquire the habit of hurting myself – pinched myself, dig nails into skin, and so on. That is a subconscious desire to get rid of fear and bring himself to life.
If people often blush in the process of communication, it is often the evidence that he suffers from an inferiority complex. It is usually caused by fear of men and inability to establish contact with them. If the person constantly uses the words-parasites “type”, “short”, “here”, “say”, “as they say,” “so to speak”, “like”, “so”, etc., it indicates that he is not confident and afraid to freely Express their thoughts.
So to deal with these habits or is it all not so bad?
Actually, not all habits need to fight. Sometimes it is absolutely not necessary, as some of them, experts say, help to cope with stress. Just we all have our own rituals against anxiety. For example, some nervous, immediately rush to wash floors, refrigerator, Laundry. What’s wrong with that? In any case, if it goes to mania, in addition to good, these habits do not bring anything.
But there are those that just need to be eradicated. But we should not forget that they are, as already mentioned in the beginning, is a reaction to any uncomfortable situation, stress. Therefore, getting rid of habits (or replacing it with another, less unpleasant) does not relieve from anxiety. Even if a person stops nail biting or Smoking, it will still need to observe yourself to understand what caused it. To force myself not to bite my nails, in General, can, but, first, it will take a lot of effort, and secondly, having not found the reason, people will sooner or later end up right back where you started. Or replace one bad habit with another.
That’s why it’s so important to find out the root cause of their anxiety, aggression, or uncertainty. In this case, the obsessive habits can even leave by themselves. Only to find out this stuff on your own, as a rule, is very difficult, so it is better to consult a specialist. Although it is believed that if these habits “sin” a close person, it is quite possible to help, showing to it participation and desire to understand the source of his discomfort. Call it a Frank conversation, find out what bothers him so much and how you personally can help him. An important caveat: before you start a campaign against someone’s habits, find out how she prevents to live to him. Although, of course, if he breaks the burrs themselves almost to the blood, the level of anxiety so high that people do not even notice the cause himself pain.
How can that be?
If we are talking about nail-biting or tear burrs, experts suggest first to put in order hand – make the interior a very expensive manicure and the rule is to maintain it in good condition. Do this often enough, you will be simply a pity to throw away a bunch of money spent.
Watch your hands, remove all burrs and equate broken nails – so you can avoid the temptation of something to bite off or tear off. I know this from my own experience. And another thing: keep a nail file and tweezers.
Cut the nails as short as possible – so that there was nothing to chew, and maintain this length.
In the end, you can buy so-called children’s nail Polish designed especially for those who gnaws the nails. It is very unpleasant to the taste – every time you stick your finger in your mouth, it will feel.
I advise in situations of great excitement or alarm to do some manual labor. First, when my hands are busy, then, as a rule, is not to “coverall”. And secondly, this is a good way to escape from the cause of anxiety or stress.
Learn to speak in public
As for habits caused by self-doubt, fear of others, etc. (i.e. low self-esteem), then that is called like cures like. Psychologists recommend to use every opportunity to practice public speaking. The more your experience, the calmer and more confident you will feel alone with the audience. To get rid of words-parasites, it is useful to take for a habit to say what you think is right and correct. As a rule, fear the accumulation of experience and gaining the confidence goes away. But if not, so it was time to look for the underlying source of the problem. And here without the help of an experienced psychologist is likely still not enough.