Before you seven of the most popular phrases that we tell ourselves and each other every day. They help to rid our life from difficult issues, soul searching and life-changing actions and in return require only a little bit. Happiness.
Over time, our thoughts, namely those to which we often return, become our beliefs. And well, if these beliefs help us to move forward make us confident in themselves and in their own potential. But if these beliefs are based on thoughts that pull us back — fears, insecurities, and apathy, you can expect trouble.
Sometimes we lie. A white lie — that’s how we called this cheating. And who are we actually saving? Myself, of course. Struggling to escape from the truth that here and now to feel good. Why ask difficult questions? Why try to break the vicious circle, if it is comfortable? Why fight for truth if a lie can be an excellent substitute reality? Indeed, it is better to live a day to watch TV, not read books, go on Fridays to the bar and avoid painful truths. Sound don’t forget to crank up the volume, otherwise the risk is great to hear the inner voice, and he has some bad news for you.
In this article we have gathered seven of the most common phrases that although make your life comfortable in the here and now, but really only hurt — they keep you from being happy and realized in the long term.
He (she) will change
The bad news: neither he nor she will not change. If the channels on your new TV you can configure according to their own preferences, then that will not work. Even if you know that the way of life that leads close to you, destroys it, you still can’t now. You can condemn or support it, quarrel, or attempt to send, but what ever you do, the final decision still rests with him. Take the choice of another person (even if that choice is contrary to your principles), how you make winter came two months early — why whine and complain about wet snow, if you can get some warm clothes and accept the fact that nature does not particularly care about your opinion. The only person you can control and change is yourself. Lifestyle, habits, feelings, thoughts, all at your disposal.
Someday I’ll do it
Oh Yes, someday this day will come. The sun will Shine, birds will sing, people will smile to each other, and you’ll be doing that for a long time wanted to finally finish the book, buy tickets to Iceland, to repair the Cabinet door and sit on a diet. Well, sports will do. And a raise ask for. And repairs in the room will finish. In General, the day will be good and fruitful. There is only one small but — this day will never happen. But it will be different. The day when you will Wake up and realize that everything is over and no strength even to stand up (about damn door already and say nothing). Yes, you say that it’s a terrible cliché but we really don’t know how much time we have left in stock. And does it matter? We know the main thing — sooner or later everything will come to an end. And this knowledge is enough to stop procrastinating and start planning.
If I had more time I would have done this, this and that
You bought an annual subscription to the gym and never went to the gym. You since last winter planning to go on a diet, but still prefer for lunch sandwiches, and dinner dumplings (what? but quick, hearty and tasty). You are convinced that the chief specifically downloads you work, because they do not want you to met with friends and went in the evening to a movie. You live in a constant time trouble and permanently don’t have time. Agree to live the way you want, you just missing it. More precisely, free time. Once it appears, you will immediately begin to meditate, to stand in the bar, read books, walk for 20 minutes a day, preparing healthy meals, going to the theatre and cross stitching. Alas, even for very busy people nature-so why not provide an extra couple of hours in the day (maybe she just didn’t count on the emergence of social networks, computer games and e-mail with urgent work emails). So no need to choose — for 24 hours you need to get done and what you need and what you want. How? It’s simple (and difficult at the same time) — don’t waste time on something that is not necessary, and that is not desirable.
If I had “X”, then everything would be better
The point is that if you are unhappy now, it is unlikely that you will happy when get “X” — even if you dream of eternal love, increase of wages, slender body and a racing car. Agree, much of what you now have was once this “X”. But you got what you want, put a tick in the box opposite and moved to the next item on the list. So what? Were you happy? Or can’t you remember? There is not some magic thing that always slips away from you and which guarantees absolute happiness. The only available for you the magic now is to turn what you already have, what you need.
Even if everyone says that there is no way, he is still there. Anywhere, but there. So whenever you say the phrase: “I can’t find a job / can’t get additional education to / can’t end a relationship that has become obsolete / can’t open a business because I have no time / no resources/ no power and not enough knowledge”, you actually mean: “If I make a little more effort and still try, quite possibly I will, but I’d rather leave things as they are and be a victim.” No doubt, to deceive myself easier than to overcome the fear of failure and risk. But in fact, at this point, you are making a disadvantageous deal, you exchange their capabilities, their freedom and their potential for imaginary security and stability that you will never be guaranteed. And what happens? And it turns out that the risk of unnecessarily increasing, and likely to remain with the broken trough without any prospects for becoming real as never before.
I’m not ready to do “X”
Want open secret? In this life anything can not be finished a hundred percent. Even if you read all the books about birth and parenting, you still have to make a million of their own discoveries. The same applies to other spheres of life. For example, it is not necessary to wait for the time when you’re ready to start looking for a new job. Just start. Remember: if you refuse to do anything, motivating its decision by the fact that it is still not ready, then you are either not interested in reality, or just go on about your own procrastination. Procrastination caused by anxiety and fear of the unknown.
I’m not good enough to do “X”
This is the most dangerous lie. You are good enough to do what you want. Do what you like. To do what you love. At your disposal not much time to waste on trying to earn or defend their own right to a rich, harmonious and happy life. And who are the judges? Who will decide what you deserve and what is not? The fact that you have appeared in this light, is the main argument in your favor. And everything else — things come and go.