This article will cut the grass from under feet of you and will force your head to work.
№5. The world concerns only the fact that it can receive from you
Let’s assume that the person whom you love above all was just hit. Lies on the street, bleeding profusely and shouting. The guy approaches and speaks to you “Depart”. He inspects a wound of your darling and gets a penknife — is going to operate directly on the street.
You ask: “You are a doctor?”
He answers: “No”.
You speak: “But you know, what are you doing, huh?”
At this moment the guy flies into a rage. He says that he good, honest that he always arrives on time. He reports that he is an excellent son, his life is full of fascinating hobbies, and still he is proud of the fact that he never uses foul language.
You are confused: “What fucking value has all this when my love lies here and bleeds profusely! I need someone who knows how to operate gunshot wounds! You can or not?!?”
And now the guy begins to agitate — what you such superficial and selfish? You that? All these his excellent qualities don’t concern? You didn’t hear that he has told you that he always remembers birthday of the girl? And in the light of all these abrupt pieces, really really matters whether he is able to operate?
At this moment you jump, catch it with the blood-stained hands by shoulders, you will stir up and you will shout: “Yes, nothing from this shit has values because it is a special situation, and I need someone who can stop bleeding, you are a sick fucking bastard”.
And here she, my awful thing about the adult world: You in just the same situation each separately taken day. And you on the place of that guy with a penknife, and society — the bleeding profusely victim of firing.
If you want to know why society, seemingly, avoids you or why you aren’t respected, so it because society is full of people who need something. They need the built houses, they need food, they need entertainments, they need satisfactory passionate communications. And you have arrived to the place of an emergency situation with a penknife in hands, just owing to the birth — at the moment when you come to this world, you become part of the system developed strictly to listen to needs of people.
Or you will bother on a task “to listen to needs of people” and you will earn a unique set of skills, or the world will boot off you under the back. And it is unimportant as far as you are kind, generous and polite. You will be poor, you will be lonely, you will be exposed on a frost.
It seems cruel, primitive or materialistic? How about love and kindness — really they mean nothing? Of course, mean. Until they — a consequence of that, what are you doing to people something that they can’t receive in other place.
№4. That, what are you doing, isn’t obliged to bring money, it has to bring benefit to people
Let me give an example not about money with which you won’t be able to argue. I read several dozens of stories a year from the desperate lonely children. These children are indignant that women don’t want to be with them in spite of the fact that they the loveliest in the world. I can explain that not so with such set of mental installations, but Alec Baldwin will make it far better me again.
In this case Baldwin plays a role of attractive women. They, of course, don’t speak so directly and sharply — society teaches us not to be honest with people — but the same essence. “Good guy? Whom does it concern? If you want to work here, implement the plan”.
“What? You say that I will have no good girl until I have no good salary and a lot of money?”
No, your brain jumps to such conclusion that you had a justification not to take into account of any who doesn’t agree with you because it is simply superficial and selfish. I ask what you offer? You are clever? Amusing? Interesting? Talented? Ambitious? Creative? Ok, and what are you doing, to show these qualities to the world? Don’t say that you are a good guy — it insufficiently. Pretty little girls have guys who are lovely with them 36 times in the course of the day. The patient bleeds profusely on the street. You know how to operate him or not?
“Well, I am not the racist, not greedy, not cruel! Not such as other swine!”
Sorry, I know that it is difficult to listen to it, but if everything that you can do, is the list of shortcomings which you don’t have, then depart on horse-radish from the patient. That witty handsome man with promising career is ready to operate.
It has broken to you heart? OK, and that now? You are going to be depressed about it or you will go to study as the surgeon? Depends on you, but don’t complain that girls sink down on geeks; they sink down on geeks because at these geeks is that to offer them. “But I well am able to listen!” Da? Because you want to sit quietly instead of getting chance to be in proximity with the pretty girl (and to carry out every second in dreams of that, skin, how soft at her)? And now imagine that in life of this girl there is other guy who is able to listen, and still he plays the guitar.
To say that you are a good guy — all the same what to be restaurant which sells not different dishes, and simply “food which won’t poison you”. You as the new movie with the name “Cinema in English” and a slogan “Actors it is well visible”.
I think that for this reason you can be “the good guy” and still feel awfully, thinking of itself. Namely…
№3. You hate yourself because you do nothing
“And what? You say that I have to read the book how to find the girl?”
Yes, but only if step the first in this book “Become That Person near Whom Girls Want to Be”.
This step always falls. Always “As to me to find work?”, but not “As to become me that person of whom employers dream?” Always “How to make so that I was pleasant to beautiful girls?”, but not “As to become me that who is pleasant to beautiful girls?”. You see, because the second questions most likely will demand from you to give up all this many of your favourite hobbies, to pay more attention to appearance, and god knows that else. Perhaps, you even should change your personality.
“But why I can’t find someone who will fall in love with me it what I am?”, you ask. Answer: Because people need a lot of things. The victim bleeds profusely, and everything that you can do, to watch it and to suffer that isn’t present in the world of gunshot wounds which are treated in itself.
There is one more video. What stops you fastening труселя and a raincoat, to jump out on a scene and to swing a penis in public? This guy knows a victory secret in human life: to make something… better than not to make it.
“But I not in everything am good!”. Well, I have good news — sufficient time for repetition, and you will be able to be not bad in everything. I was the most crappy writer when was a teenager. I became a little better in 25. And while I desperately failed the career, I wrote eight years in a row, under article in free time in a week before I have begun to receive for it money. I needed 13 years to become rather good writer and to be included in the list of best-sellers of New York Times. I needed 20 000 hours of practice to grind my crappy texts.
The prospect to spend all the time for obtaining skills isn’t pleasant? Well, I have good news and bad news. Good — similar dedicated practice will help you to come out the shell — I have endured years of boring office work because I knew that I receive unique skills on the party. People give up business halfway because results are visible not at once because they can’t imagine that process is and there is a result.
Bad news — at you aren’t present the choice. If you want to work here, implement the plan.
In my not expert opinion, you hate yourself not because of the low level of self-esteem, not because people to you are cruel. You hate yourself because you do nothing. Even you can’t “love yourself it what you are” — that is why you are unfortunate and you send me private messages, asking what you have to make with the life.
Solve a problem: What is the time you spend for the consumer pieces made by other people (a TV set, music, video games, the websites) instead of doing something special? Only it adds value to your existence.
And if you don’t like to hear it if you correspond to the phrase “Important only the fact that in you” which was heard in the childhood then I can tell you one…
№2. What in you, important, only if it forces you something to do
As I in this business, I know a lot of ambitious authors. They think of themselves that they are writers, they are represented so at parties, they realize it deeply in themselves, they have literary hearts. The only thing that they miss — where actually their devil’s works.
But whether actually has this value? Written — everything that is important, for definition of the one who is a writer and who doesn’t?
For the sake of Lord’s love and.
It is the general reception of protection against all I spoke above and long ago about, and from any voice of criticism in your life. It is that piece which is told us by our ego to save us from a hard work over itself: “I know that inside I am a good person”. It can be also formulated as “I know who I am is” and “I just have to be myself”.
Don’t misunderstand me; you inside — all. The guy who has built the house for the family from scratch and of improvised materials has made it because he such inside. Any bad act which you have made has begun with a bad impulse, some thought ricocheted in your skull until you haven’t been forced to make it. And any good act becomes by the same principle. “Who you are inside” is a metaphorical manure on which your fruit grow.
And here what everyone has to know. And what many of you can’t accept:
“You are a fruit and anything else”.
Nobody is concerned by your manure. “Who you are inside” has no value in a separation from what you make for other people.
Inside you have huge compassion to the poor. It’s cool. Some actions about it became result of this compassion? Whether you hear about some awful tragedy and you speak at the same time “Oh, poor children. Report to them that I think of them”? Go нахрен if it so — find out that it is necessary for them, and help. Hundred million people have watched video Kony, virtually all of them thought of those poor African children. But what was made by this society of these thoughts? Devil’s shit. Children die every day because millions us speak to themselves what to worry — it is also good, as well as to do. It is the internal mechanism controlled by the lazy part of our brain preserving us against real actions.
How many from you beats about the bush now and she / he goes on “By all means would fall in love with me if only I knew/knew what I am an interesting person!” Truth? And how all these your interesting thoughts and ideas could transfer themselves to the world independently? Or they have to become the reason of actions? If the girl or the guy of your dream would shoot with a hidden camera by you for a month, they would be impressed then with what was seen? You remember, they don’t read mind, they can only see. They would like to become part of your life?
Everything about what I ask you, it to apply to myself the same standards which you apply to others. You for certain have an irritating Christian friend whose all help is reduced to “I will pray for them”. It doesn’t dement you? I don’t comment now, prayers work or not, but it doesn’t change the fact that this person has chosen that type of the help which doesn’t demand from him to tear off a bum from a sofa. Such people abstain from any evil, their thoughts are pure, their internal manure is pure so as far as it is possible, but what fruit on him will grow? And they have to understand it better, than somebody — I has stolen a fruit metaphor from the Bible. Jesus repeated something it seems “a tree judge by his fruits” again, both again, and again. Jesus never spoke “If you want to work here, implement the plan”. No, he told “Each tree which isn’t yielding good fruits it is necessary to cut down and throw into fire” (Gospel of Matthew).
People badly react when they are told such things. As well as managers from the movie badly reacted to Alec Baldwin’s words that they should grow at last eggs or to change a job on cleaners of footwear. As leads us to final point.
№1. Everything in you will fight against development
The human reason is a miracle, and you will never see his work better than while he battles against obvious certificates on need of changes. Your mentality is equipped with the protection mechanisms developed for shooting of everything that can get moving forward some things in you — ask any addict.
Even now some of you read it and feel how the brain automatically bombards read and demands not to accept it. By the experience I can tell that bombings can take place in a form:
— Intended understanding of any criticism as insults
“Who is he to call me lazy and useless! The good person wouldn’t begin to talk to me so! He has written all this simply to feel the superiority over me that I is crappy felt! And I so won’t leave it, I will even the score!”
— Concentration on the one who says, but not that they say
“Who is HE such to speak to me as to me to live! Oh, look at him what he big and strong! And actually next moronic graphomaniac from a network! I will go and will dig out to him something that will convince me that he is stupid! Such pretentious that I feel sick! I saw his old rap video on YouTube, and his rhymes — a sediment!”
— Concentration on tone of the message, but not on his contents
“I will rummage everything, I won’t find yet a joke which sounds offensively, being pulled out from a context, and then I will speak and think only of it! I heard that one offensive word can bury the whole book!”
— Editing own history
“Everything isn’t so bad! I know that I tried to commit suicide last month, but now it is already best of all for me! It is quite probable that if I continue in the same spirit, everything eventually will work! I will take a big break, and I will continue to show interest in that girl so as a result she will come!”
— Confidence that any change of is a treachery of the present of
“Aha, that is I have to throw all the comics and instead plow for 6 hours a day in the gym? And to use autosuntan as all these morons from a TV show? Because it is the only alternative”.
And so on. You remember, sufferings — it is convenient. That is why many people prefer them. Happiness demands efforts.
And courage. Incredibly easy to use know that if you create nothing in this life, then nobody will be able to attack what you have created.
It is how more simply simple to sit on a bum and to criticize what is created by the others. The cinema is silly. This couple of children is brought badly up. The relations of this couple have wallowed in confusion. This rich man small as person. That restaurant — a sediment. This Internet writer — the cretin. I better will leave under his work the comment in which I will demand from the website that he was dismissed. You see, I have created something.
And, wait, I have forgotten about it to mention? Yes, all you tried to construct or create — whether it be the poem, new skill, the new relations — you will immediately find yourself surrounded “not – creators”, abusing what you have made. Can be behind your back, but they will do it. Your drunk friends will be against your sobriety. Your fat friends won’t want that you have begun the new fitness mode. Your jobless friends won’t want to see your immersion in career.
David Wong (c)